My birthday

I am so blown away. These students of mine they act so tough and like they don't care and that they don't like me. I was worried about the fact that I was not making connections. Every teachers manual written talks about how you cannot teach students that you do not make a connection with. Then I had my birthday. A couple of teachers and their classes gave me presents in the morning. I only told my students in passing when my birthday was and I could not figure out how the teachers knew about the birthday. Well my students threw me a surprise birthday party! It was their idea, they planned it and made me a cake and two cards and got me flowers. All the teachers said they had never done that before. The card said I was the best teacher in the world. They usually tell me I am mean. WOW I made connections. They may be learning something.

Then I woke up late on Friday (10-30) I was late, I had a big day. Today was a Halloween party and the carnival. We had two booths one ring toss and one musical chairs. I had a lot to bring to school so I decided to drive. I pulled my car out of the garage and then started to close the garage door and I caught my finger as it folded down. Man it hurt. It is still tender. Then the bag rips as I unloaded my car. We did not get anyone to play musical chairs. It is a good thing the ring toss made some money. What a fund raiser. The day was long but went pretty well despite my wounds. Glad it is Friday. It is cold and snowing a little and I am ready for a long weekend curled up and warm.

South Dakota

I just got back from four days in South Dakota. I went with my Native friend. We stayed with her friends. It was definitely in the middle of nowhere. I posted a couple of pictures from the house where I stayed. They had a large population of ground hogs. Not only ground hogs but a bald eagle was there hunting them.

One day we went to Mt. Rushmore and the Crazy Horse monument. I learned the Native history of the Crazy Horse. The museum was wonderful there and the gift shop had a lot of Native made things. It was a full day of sight seeing.

The people I stayed with were Lakota Sioux. They filmed Dances with Wolves near where I stayed. These people spoke fluent Lakota and they are fighting to keep their traditions alive. The younger generation are not listening to what their elders are trying to pass down and with every loss of a grandmother or grandfather, the native traditions and languages are being lost.

I did get to enjoy a sweat lodge. While I could not take pictures of this ceremony out of respect to my new native friends, I can tell you a little about it. In the morning, we got up and stripped the lodge of all the blankets and tarps they cover the wood frame with and shake out the blankets that are inside. Then we set them out so they could air out in the wind. Then we went inside and spent the rest of the day cooking traditional food. We made bread for rolls, a wonderful soup made with deer meat and squash, buffalo tongue, buffalo kidneys and a wild berry desert. The other native women began to arrive about four hours before the sweat and they brought more food. We had a great time laughing and talking and teasing each other. The hearts of these people are so open and welcoming I forgot I was the stranger. I know God had been here before me to open hearts and prepare the way for me. About two hours before the sweat, we covered the lodge layering on blankets and tarps making sure there were no holes and placed the blankets inside. We also placed rocks under wood and built a large fire. More visiting and then we were ready to sweat. There was a small prayer and ceremony on the outside of the lodge then the women crawled in and placed the red hot rocks in. The water was pour over the rocks along with herbs and the steam filled the lodge and heated us all up. I don't know how long we were in but I enjoyed the sweat. We all prayed and sang and I came out feeling refreshed and closer to God. It was interesting how there were different people gathered together and we had different things to pray about but all our differences faded away and we were united for a short while.

I had a peaceful weekend, the weather was great it rained a little and was sunny most of the time. Not too cold except for the constant wind sweeping the prairie. Now it is Wednesday and it is getting cold. The weather man is promising snow tonight about 6-8 inches with wind. I hear that is a blizzard out hear. But so far no snow just dropping temperatures. I guess winter is arriving and time for me to bundle up. I am looking forward to my trip back home for Christmas and hope to be able to fly my sons home from Texas.

Blessings on all who read this.

Snow in October? Really snow in October?

Well, it snowed last week on Friday and the snow is just going away and it is Monday. It is only the first week in October and already there is snow on the ground. What have I gotten myself into? Lucky it was a small amount and the wind blew it off the roads but it was and still is cold. With a capital C, C O L D. I hear it gets even colder in January. Oh man am I in trouble. I have been adopted by a nice Native American woman who is showing me around. We went to visit her relatives. I had just eaten dinner when she called me and wanted to know if I wanted to go with her. Well, we get there and sit at the kitchen table and they put food in front of you and ask what you would like to drink. You cannot turn them down because that is very insulting. So I ate another meal. They say the reason they feed whoever comes to visit is because food is the sustenance of life and they are blessing you with a long life.

I learned how to make Indian fried bread. They use it for a lot of food but they mostly use it to make Indian Tacos which is fantastic. My family at home is in for a treat at Christmas time. They do not know this but I am making them Indian Tacos. UMMM I can hardly wait.

At school we are gearing up for the Halloween Carnival,. My students have decided to do musical chairs. I know that sounds lame but we are giving out great prizes and I think we will be on our way to earning some money for our end of year field trips. Ugh field trips are not something I look forward to the work the planning the outside the classroom management too tiring but I have a few months to get ready.

I was reading in my devotional "A Woman After God's Own Heart" the other day and it said that I should surrender everything to God daily. Don't you just hate it when God speaks to you about things you don't want to deal with? I know what God was talking about. I had to surrender my hope of moving back home in the spring and I did not want to trust God with that. Silly me, I know I can trust God with everything. I am on this adventure because I trusted God completely. But I feared that God's will was for me to stay and I don't want to stay. I want to go home and be close to my family. But as my wise sister told me, if I don't surrender to God I will not have the peace, or joy that comes with obedience. God will not force anyone to surrender but He also cannot work with a stubborn heart. If I do not surrender, than what ever it is the God wishes to accomplish with me here cannot be done. So I surrendered. The homesickness does not occur as often, I am more at peace and able to handle my class better (I think), and I am starting laugh and become more joyful. I am standing on the promise that God said "I know the plans I have for you, to prosper you and not harm you." I know God wants the best for me and I refuse to settle for second best and since He can see the big picture and I cannot, I will surrender and trust Him to know what is best.

"May God bless and keep you, may He shed His countenance upon you and give you peace."

October Plans

While it is tough teaching my students because of behavior, it breaks my heart to hear about their home lives. A lot of my students live in war zones due to drugs and alcohol. These kids have such potential but they are hurting deeply. I can tell they want to trust me but they always question me about whether I will be sticking around. I tell them that I don't know what the future brings. My ultimate goal is to live and teach on the Oregon coast. I tell them that I do not know if I will be offered a job for the next year or if I will get an offer on a dream job and move back to Oregon. But what I do know is that I am here this year and I am not giving up on them and if I move during the summer, it will not be because of them.

On Fridays I am so tired of the battle field that I do not want to return on Mondays. But God always come through for me. Case in point, I spent today (Saturday) slowly cleaning my house, talking to my sons and my sister which made me miss home. I watched one movie after another and talked with God about how badly I want to return home in the summer. I emailed a principal I know to let her know that I would be available should an opening for the next school year manifest itself. I was getting down about the fact that Saturday always seems to fly and I was not ready for Sunday or Monday to come. It was about 9:00 pm when I got a knock on my door. This is unusual as most people here to not visit in the evening because people are usually in night clothes and do not want to be seen. So I open the door and there my neighbor who is a wonderful native woman and has adopted me, was standing there. She asked me if I was doing anything tonight and I said no. She then invited me to drive her to New Town to the casino and for a couple of hours. I reluctantly said yes because that is a 35 mile drive and it was 9:00 pm.

I am so glad I did. It was fun. She knows everyone and I met two of her sisters. I played the penny machines and won enough to continue playing on my original 20 dollars for three hours. Then we drove home and she encouraged me and we discussed teaching and lesson planning. I learned about a tradition the natives believe in. They carry tobacco pouches with them and they throw them out the window as an offering after they pray that any four legged animal will stay away from the road. She forgot to do this and we almost hit a fawn as it followed its mom across the road. She immediately pulled out a pouch of tobacco and prayed and threw it out the window. Now she prays the same God I pray to, the one true God. I am not sure if this is a pagan thing or not but let me tell you we saw a deer close to the road on our way home but no four legged animals crossed into the road and that is unusual at 1:30 am around here. She says that the Natives believe that animals have a spirit and that makes them brothers and sisters and the prayer is their way of respecting life.

She also has invited me to go to a class with her that is teaching the history of Teddy Roosevelt and what he did for North Dakota. We even will be touring his ranch in Medora ND. I am also going with her in the end of October to South Dakota. We are going to visit her family and friends and do a "Sweat". I get to go into an authentic sweat lodge with other women. We pray and sweat and this purifies our bodies, minds and souls. I can hardly wait. Also I will be sight seeing and touring Mt Rushmore among other places with traditional Native Americans who will teach me all about the history and importance of several spots. I hope to got to wounded knee but I am not sure it we will be near there. I can hardly wait. I am praying the weather is nice since it usually starts snowing and getting nasty around the end of October.

My sons are doing real well in Houston. My oldest is excelling at his school becoming a mechanic and loving it. He does not usually like to talk on the phone but we have been having great conversations that last up to an hour. My youngest plans on starting auto body repair courses in January. God has been so good to us. It is amazing. I am not use to living under His abundance. I am trying to be a good steward. I am learning about a foreign concept called savings. I have never had money to save before and now I do. The four years of great struggle have taught me to trust God with everything and appreciate everything He has given me. I also have honed the gift of perseverance and now I am learning to live in God's abundance. My cup does runeth over. And soon I will have a savings account. I always thought those were myths. Oh and I finally can work one job instead of three and have extra money another myth proven. LOL.

Well it is late and I may get to go to a sweat tomorrow and not wait for the end of October so I had best get to bed. I hope this finds all of you well and content. I may miss my home but God is giving me chances to choose to be content. I am taking everyone of them. I tell my students that hate and anger are a choice, well so is joy and contentment and I choose to be content and surrendered to God until He takes me home be that my temporary home of Oregon or my permanent home in Heaven. Praise God for small outings that change my perspective. Night all. pleasant dreams.